


Ren

by Sheek Martin (SheekMartin)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Angst, Desire, Dystopian, F/F, F/M, Metahumans, Multi, Mutants, Other, Pain, Star Wars - Freeform, X-men - Freeform, powers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 16:48:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29861118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheekMartin/pseuds/Sheek%20Martin
Summary: Newly, self-appointed leader of 'The Knights', Kylo Ren struggles to bridge the conflict he feels growing between his new role as Commander and the strange connection he shares with the order's most unique detainee.Wyn Sinwah is seemingly the last human left alive after a civil war between meta-humans has wiped out their population.  Having learned to survive on her own, she runs into trouble after being captured by 'The Knights.'Set in an AU | Wyn is meant to be a type of Y/N
Relationships: Knights of Ren/Original Character(s), Kylo Ren/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	1. The Oddity

A crack of lightning pierced the grim landscape, illuminating the decrepit atmosphere for a few moments. The sky swirled in an eerie blend of dark brown and green. There was not much left to the once beautiful skyline, and the city that had once been known as 'New York' was nothing more than a crumbling rotted reminder of how devastating war could be. 

The deafening snap of thunder ricocheted through my chest like a gun shot and I tightened my grip around my knees; If I squeezed hard enough, maybe I could melt into the rocks behind me.

Maybe that was my power...

Doubtful.

"Sir," a deep voice called again,"sir, we mustn't linger. There are still rebels in this area that have not yet been detained."

I remained hidden, perfectly camouflaged. Even the slightest movement would alert them to my presence.

It was always dangerous, venturing to the surface, but with the night quickly approaching I ran the risk of going without supplies. The last night lasted about 89 hours.

I hadn't taken into account the possibility of running into them. The Knight Order routinely patrolled the surface, to either draft in unallied mutants to their cause or snuff out any remaining Resistance.

The sound of multiple combat boots grew louder and adrenaline flooded through me. I was neither a mutant or Resistance. I wondered what Knights did with unbranded humans.

Well, they probably won't parade me around as a mascot. Maybe they'll kill me quick though... I considered. Death was not the concept that sparked fear within me.

"Quiet..." another dark voice murmured.

I dared to peek from beneath the weathered, thread bare cloak still concealing my location. A group of four men, dressed from head to toe in dark, worn leather stood with their backs toward one another; each one facing a different direction.

They all wore different versions of body armor, but they also were individually decorated with different types of weaponry.

Though a shiver of dread spiked up my spine, I couldn't help but feel a small sense of awe in seeing the famed Knights for the first time; well, four of the six, for the first time.

Just then, the tallest figure turned. The helmet he wore, black and chrome with violent bursts of blood red streaked and scattered throughout, honed on my gaze.

Though I couldn't see his eyes, I felt them. I was no longer hidden beneath my cleaver illusion. I might as well have been standing in the middle of the desolate wasteland, dressed in all white, for that's how exposed I felt under his gaze.

"There." 

Running would have been pointless, and fear would have been ill-advised.

Two of the Knights walked towards me, instantly removing the cloak that had kept me hidden and pulled me to my feet.

I looked from one to the other as I struggled to pull my arms free. I wouldn't run, but I hated feeling trapped. I continued yanking, unsuccessfully, until I felt my body pinned beneath an unseen force, preventing me from moving further.

Panic began to rise.

"What is this?!" I yelled at them, receiving no response back.

The tallest one was facing away from me, but the other three figures stood with their helmets facing him. He must have been in charge.

"What the hell did you do to me! Why can't I move?!" I yelled at him.

After another moment of silence, he turned to speak to the one standing next to him.

"A human..." his voice was disguised by a modulator, but I could hear a faint hint of intrigue. I glared at him.

"Sir," I turned to my left in astonishment. They all wore modulators in their helments, so their voices were distorted and terrifying, but this one's was disctincly lighter. This forbidding, tall masked creature was a woman!

The leader turned his head back in my direction, remained still for a moment, then sighed.

"Very, interesting..." he murmured.

Without meaning to, I leaned slightly away from him, into the female knight. I had no reason to assume any one of them would be more or less dangerous than the other, but the leader was definately the last one I'd want this close to me.

The longer I watched him, the dizzier I became. I wasn't sure if it was from the exposure, being out on the surface this long, or from this strange situation, but I felt the lightheadedness winning.

Oddly enough, he lifted his hand toward my face, as if he were about to touch me, tilted his wrist and my mind went dark.

***

"...you can't just leave me here!"

I'm running. I'm screaming. I wave my hands over my head, but the cruiser does not slow down.

My legs are weak, human, just so weak.

They're gone.

I shot straight up, disoriented and damp. 

I stiffled the sob that threatened to erupt from my chest, and closed my eyes to concentrate on regulating my breath. 

One. I'm ok.

Two. I'm ok.

Three. I'm ok.

My shoulders relxaxed and the tightness in my chest disappeared. 

I looked around and realized they had put me in a cell of some kind. The walls were all stone and the only entrance I could see in the poorly lit area was through a large circular hole, covered by bars. 

I ran my hand up the wall I had been lying against. It was imperfectly smooth and cool to the touch. 

Must be under ground... 

I moved my legs from the military grade cot I had been sleeping on, and realized I was no longer dressed in my own garments. Instead of my thick jacket and multiple layers of cothing, I was wearing a dark grey robe of some sort, that was too large for me. 

Annoyance shot through me while I considered how long it had taken me to aquire the industrial boots that I wore while on the surface. All my clothes actually, I had spent months searching for, were gone. 

My bare feet touched the cold, damp texture of the ground, and I immediately retreated back onto the cot. I was used to wearing multiple protective layers constantly, so this cold, wet enviornment was new.

I was freezing here, and the light robe I wore did nothing against the cold. 

That's probably why they were all dressed so severly. 

Voices sounded down the corridor, but there was no distortion. I felt a small sense of releif; at least it wasn't a knight. 

A man and a woman glided to a stop in front of the bars, leading to my cell. 

To describe them as odd, would have been lacking in how they appeared. They were both long and pale, like the shape taffy would take if it had been stretched. Neither of them seemed to have any hair, and they both dressed in tight form fitting suits. That was the only way I could tell it was a man and a woman, but that was it. 

The man waved his hand over the bars and the metal groaned in obedience as an opening appeared. The woman stepped through.

I was not afraid of their abilities; I was the oddity in this life. If anything, I envied them. 

I envied having a purpose and a place in the world. 

The woman stepped closer to me and I was able to see how delicate her skin was. From further away she only appeared pale, but standing only feet from me, I was able to see the deliacate illuminating quality to it and forced myself not to reach out and touch her. 

"My name is Tes and this is my brother Roz," she said. Her voice was similar to mine, which was suprising. I had anticipated hearing an ethereal, otherworldy type of sound. "I'm here to bring you to Commander Ren, but I know you are not acclimated to our enviornement."

The man stepped into the cell and I was unable to feel afraid.

"Would you mind coming with us...?" The very normal tone to his voice trailed off.

"I'm sorry," Tes interjected, "we don't seem to know your name."

If they wanted to know my name, they must not be planning on killing me... What could it hurt?

"It's Wyn."

"Do you know much about The Knight Order," Tes asked me in a soft tone. I shook my head in response.

She was quiet for a moment, then spoke again, "May I ask how long you've been on the surface?"

I considered her question, not entirely sure how to answer. Time was not a consistent marker to gauge. Night and day did not have the same meanings they used to; before the Wars.

"Awhile," I replied. I didn't mean to sound indifferent or rude, but it was an honest answer. I wasn't even entirely sure how old I was. I knew a significant amount of time had passed since Nan died; I was little more than a child then.

She continued to ask me questions about my existence above while Roz remained silent, standing across the room. He was watching me, but not in an uncomfortable way. He seemed sad, almost sympathetic. I didn't understand why.

They were actually both acting quite careful with me. I couldn't know for sure though, since I hadn't been in contact with anyone since Nan. It seemed odd; they reminded me of myself when I would approach a small wounded animal. 

"We are going to take you to a decontamination room now. After that we will provide you some new clothes and boots." She turned toward her brother.

"I will need to get your measurements," he said in the same soft tone, "would that be acceptable, or would you prefer Tes?"

I stood, the same freezing temperature of the stone shooting up my legs.

"No, it's fine," I replied. I turned away from them and dropped the robe.

I suppose I should have felt embarrassed or nervous, naked in front of strangers.

I did appreciate their desire to respect my privacy, but it didn't seem important enough to be concerned over. I was already a stranger in this strange land, anything more that I had to endure would simply be 'the next thing'.

Once he was done getting the information he needed, Tes lifted the robe back to my shoulders and escorted me through another set of doors on the side of the room.

I was somewhat surprised. A row of showers lined the back wall along with a set of mirrors. A toilet was on the adjacent wall.

Plumbing...

"I will step out so you can attend to your needs, but if you will start in the first shower here," she motioned to the small chrome shower, "once the red liquid has stopped, just step into the next. The system will scan you and automatically adjust to you and you needn't do anything but stand under the streams. Ok?"

I nodded to her again and she left.

I stood in front of the long mirror and dropped my robe again. Gazing at myself, I wasn't entirely sure I recognized the person staring back at me. I'd seen my reflection in painted glass and shattered mirrors before, but not naked, under the glare of these harsh lights.

Something clogged in my throat as I struggled to understand why I felt like crying. Something gnawed at me, buried in the back of my mind...

I turned toward the showers and began the process of 'decontamination.' 

Once the last nozzle automatically clicked off, I stepped back out on the cold stone, and noticed two piles. 

On top of the pile of towels there were toiletries. I barely had a memory of how to use them but was stunned by the level of care my captors were displaying. 

I dried off quickly and braided my clean hair down the back of my head. I looked up into the mirror again and was astounded at the person looking back. She was somewhat pretty. Gone were the dirty scrapes and smudges that had been covering her face. Her eyes looked less hollow and her skin was no longer dull.

After my small appraisal I turned my focus to the clothes. A set of undergarments sat on top; simple, white, light fabric.

A perfect fit, of course.

After pulling on the turtleneck and a pair of pants, I was pleased with how warm I felt. The material was thick and light at the same time, and I was amazed at how comfortable the clothes were despite the fact they fit relatively snug to my body.

I pulled on the provided black boots and zipped them up over the pant legs and went back to look in the mirror.

The dark gray tone of the clothes made my skin appear lighter, and I realized what was pushing against my memory. I looked like my mother. 

A firm knock sounded against the door and a sense of dread filled my stomach. A large dark figure joined me in the bright room.

It was the female knight. 

Despite the fact I knew she was a 'she,' her height and demeanor was no less intimidating. I was able to get a better look at her in the light. Her helmet was less bulky and contained delicate lines etched along the cheeks and nose. Her uniform was form fitting and her weapons were slightly smaller. A brown leather strap crossed over her breasts like an X and sheathed in 4 locations were daggers.

"I am Cara," she began, "I'm here to take you to Commander Ren. If you would please follow me." Her voice was still contorted through the modulator. I nodded and followed her out.

At the end of the hall was a single elevator. I turned around but was unable to see any sign of Tes or Roz. I had hoped to thank them for their kindness, but I missed the opportunity.

Once in the elevator, I noticed the display of numbers along the wall. There were 24 levels, and it appeared we were at the bottom. The knight waved her hand over a black scanner and lights appeared next to the numbers. She pressed 10 and within seconds we were flying up.

So, the elevators are for authorized people only.

As we slowed to a stop and stepped out, I realized I should have been paying more attention to my surroundings.

But, do I want to try to escape? Back to the surface?

It wasn't as if my life was in any less danger down here, than it was up there.

The halls were wide enough for 3-4 people at a time, but completely devoid of activity. I knew The Knight Order was a large force, but I had yet to see any evidence of that. 

We arrived at a set of black double doors and the knight swiped her wrist over the scanner. The doors automatically pulled apart to reveal a large round table positioned in the middle of the very large room. The walls were decorated in black and red tapestries and the lighting was very minimal; it gave the room a warm, intimate feel.

"Have a seat, and the Commander will be in shortly."

I looked up to her and received neither comfort nor encouragement from the lifeless blank stare of her helmet. She tilted her head towards the room, and I stepped in.

The doors closed behind me with a swish and my heart began to pound.


	2. Only the Beginning

*SMASH*

I jolted upright following the crashing of something metal on the steel table.

Standing across from me was the tallest figure from the surface.

Commander Ren.

With adrenaline flowing through me again, I stiffened my back, unwilling to allow him a chance to intimidate me.

It doesn't matter who he is, I thought to myself, there is nothing to be afraid of. Just breath.

He moved, with all the grace of a predator stalking its prey, towards the chair sitting opposite me.

I glanced to the object he had slammed on the table and it was a small metal box.

"Wyn Sinwah." My name coming out through the modulator caused goosebumps to form along my arms. I wasn't sure if it was because he said my full name or because his voice seemed darker and more mechanical than before.

I stared into the black visor of his helmet and wondered what his powers were; to be the leader of The Knights.

I wonder what your voice really sounds like, I thought idly; surprising myself with the random thought. I should've been focused on how he knew my full name, but if he was the leader of whatever was left of this world, it seemed trite to wonder how he knew it.

"I know a great deal more than that," he said flatly. 

Had I said that out loud?

He reached for the metal box and slid it over to me. I felt no real reason to open it, so I kept my hands clasped tightly in my lap and lifted my gaze back to him.

He tilted his head in response, possibly intrigued by my reaction, or lack thereof.

"You're not curious."

It wasn't a question; it was a statement.

"Commander, I am unconcerned with what you think you've discovered about me." I remained impassive.

What does it matter, anyways?

"How long have you been alone."

"Awhile," I quickly replied

"How did he die?" His question threw me off guard, but I recovered quickly. 'He' could've only been in reference to Nan.

Had that been in the box...?

"Same as everyone else, I suppose," I paused, "radiation poisoning." I remained indifferent. I assumed my cool demeanor was bothering him, because his fists clenched and unclenched at his side.

I focused my attention to his helmet and considered the bright red streaks along the ridges and cracks. It had clearly been destroyed and remade; and it was frighteningly beautiful. I felt an urge to run my hands over them.

Are they smooth? Why hadn't he just made a new helmet? I wondered.

"How are you doing, that?" The tone of his voice was raised slightly, but still controlled through the helmet.

"Doing what?"

He began walking slowly around the table towards me. The closer he moved, the more uneasy I felt.

I noticed how broad his shoulders were and how thick his arms seemed. The black layers of his uniform enhanced his massive size, and I fought the urge to cringe away from him, the closer he moved.

I repositioned my back and refused to look away. He leaned down towards me; close enough for me to see my reflection in his visor.

"You're not afraid." His voice was quieter now, but it was a statement again, not a question.

"Well, you haven't given me a reason to be, have you?" I replied.

He jerked back slightly as I felt warmth filling my cheeks. I hadn't meant to say that, but he was too close.

I suddenly became very away of the fact that he and I were alone in this dark, room. The only sound was the quiet hiss of his breath through the modulator. It should have had a menacing effect, but I still was not afraid.

He remained a breath away from my face and I was overcome with a strange desire to see his face. My mouth watered involuntarily.

"You're just a human," he said quietly.

I assumed he was saying it more to his self, than to me, but it was still belittling. Why was my evolutionary status important? Where did he think we all came from? I glared at him.

Fucking asshole.

As soon as the thought left my mind, he slammed his fist into the metal box resting on the table. The top crunched beneath the force of his hand.

I jumped slightly at his reaction and we both turned our attention to the box, then back to each other.

"I can hear you," he finally spoke, the breath hissing through his modulator returning to normal.

My eye widened and I felt exposed again as he watched me.

This whole time...? He's been able to hear everything...?

"Yes," he responded, straightening his back.

I knew there were meta-humans who possessed that power, but it was rare. It probably meant he had other abilities as well.

I tried to limit any further thoughts. I didn't need him in my mind, any further than he'd already been.

I felt annoyed. I had always imagined what it would be like to meet someone, anyone. To finally know I wasn't alone anymore. I never thought it'd happen with a natural voyeur.

He let out a grunt and I looked up to him. He heard that...?

"I am not a voyeur," he said evenly.

"Well what would you call someone who roots around in your mind, trying to hear things you don't want them to hear?"

"That's not what I do," he paused. "You're very loud. It's very distracting." I didn't understand.

How can my thoughts be loud?

"I've never encountered someone who was able to pierce my mind with their thoughts. It's normally the other way around."

Oh! Like psychological rape! That makes it ok then... I sighed, defeated. How was one supposed to control their thoughts?

He reached out a hand, and I felt the familiar, unseen force lift me from the chair. I was unable to move at all, but I didn't want to let him see how legitimately afraid I was, even if he could already sense it.

"You're beginning to annoy me..." he growled, as he moved me closer to his line of sight. My hands were pinned to my sides and I struggled, unsuccessfully against the invisible bonds he had me in.

"Why don't you just let me go, then?" My voice wavered as I was inches from his face, fear spiking through my body.

He stared at me another moment, then lowered me to the ground, still inches from him. The power still had me confined and I couldn't step away.

My eye line was at his chest, and I had to tilt my head entirely up to look at the face of his human-less mask. I felt the mental grip begin to loosen from around me, slowly.

He leaned down slightly, sending chills over my body.

His voice was dark and contorted through the helmet, but still managed to illicit a warm sensation to envelope the pit of my stomach.

"Because we've only just begun."


	3. Roles to Play

Ren left without another word, and I watched in stunned silence.

It was unclear as to the reason my body was reacting the way it was. My cheeks felt flushed and my heart pounded. The warm sensations in the bottom of my belly continued to churn while I waited for my breathing to return to normal.

I sat back down, unsure as to what was going to happen to me now. Nothing had even happened with Ren. He never really asked me anything.

Surely, there's more that was supposed to happen...

I turned toward the metal box that had been crushed beneath Ren's fist. He hadn't taken it with him. I pried the lid off and lifted out a velvet pouch, two small plastic baggies and a relatively thin file.

Name: Wyn Sinwah  
Sex: Female  
Birth: 16.2123.2 – Age: 26  
Species: Human/Unknown  
Last Known Whereabouts: New York – Former BNY Mellon  
Last Known Association: None

Kin: T. Sinwah – Father – Deceased  
R. Wills - Sinwah – Mother – Deceased  
Ri. Sinwah – Brother – Deceased

N. Jitte - ? – Deceased

Other: Mother killed during third wave of insurgence. Father killed during fourth wave. Brother joined Human Resistance; Wyn left in the care of Nan Jitte (former member of Knight Order/former professor at NYU) at age 8. Brother killed in final wave.

Jitte moved Wyn to Greenwich Village shortly following brother's death. Assumed to have given her instruction. Jitte killed by Resistance 2134.

End.

I read and reread over the same line – former member of Knight Order.

Former member of The Knight Order? Nan was a meta?

Turning the page, I found two photographs. I immediately recognized the one of the young man; it was Nan. The same rigid glint in his dark green eyes and the same crocked grin. But his bald head was covered in dirty blond hair, and instead of a thick dark-grey beard, just the lightest stubble across his strong jaw line. He had been quite handsome. I wondered when this picture had been taken.

Setting it down, I looked at the second photograph and, for a moment, forgot to breath. My memory of them was quite fuzzy. The only time I thought of them was at night, when I had trouble sleeping. A faint memory of her singing me to sleep and him kissing my forehead was all I had left, and even that was beginning to fray and blur on the edges.

But here they stood, side by side in front of a bunker of some sort. The energy of the people moving behind them captured in this candid moment told me it must have been before the first wave. There was no fear, no doubts in their young faces. They were both wearing the light brown uniforms of the human resistance, but her hand rested gently over her swollen belly.

When had this been taken?

Before my mind could spiral any further, I heard heavy footfalls coming quickly. I put the file back in the box but grabbed the velvet pouch, the plastic bags and slipped them in my pockets. I gently curved the worn photos and slid them into the calf of my left boot.

I was smoothing out the raised areas of in my pockets when the metal doors slid apart.

Cara stood there, face still hidden beneath the daunting helmet.

Has anyone ever seen their faces?

Without a word, she turned and began walking away; I assumed I was expected to follow. After another trip down the hall to a separate set of elevators, and a few more twists and turns, we arrived to what appeared to be living quarters.

I was their prisoner, or at the very least their captive, so I had expected to be put back in the stone cell. I think I would have preferred being down there. The inquisitive eyes following me, as Cara continued to lead me through the populated halls, made me uncomfortable.

After passing through another secured area, we finally arrived at a series of doors spaced significantly apart along yet another concrete hall. She turned to the first one on the right and waved her hand over the keypad.

The door slid up into the wall and we stepped in. The room was very sparse, but clearly much more comfortable than the stone cell was. A decent sized bed housed the back wall, with a night table and a lamp beside it. A desk occupied the wall adjacent to the bed and on the opposite wall were two doors, about two feet apart.

"I don't understand," I finally spoke up, and turned to Cara. She didn't move or act like she heard me at all. "Please..." I said quietly. She sighed, but it came out more like a hiss through the modulator.

"You will remain here until Commander Ren orders otherwise," her tone was very final.

"But what does he want?" I stared at her, hoping to receive an answer; knowing one would never come. "I just don't understand. I'm only human... I shouldn't be here." I meant 'here' as in I shouldn't be there, with The Order; but as I considered my words, I realized the truth in them. I shouldn't be alive; I really shouldn't have been here. The truth of that fact settled over me, and I turned my gaze to the ground, unable to look any longer into the lifeless black mask.

She remained quiet, considering what I'd said.

"We all have a role to play," she said softly, then left. The door closed swiftly behind her.

Turning to the room again, I felt alone again. I walked to the bed and sat on the edge. The mattress was firm, but much softer than the makeshift mattress I had made, at home.

Home.

I closed my eyes and considered the dilapidated, run down, old bank building I'd been living in. Nan had always told me if anything happened to him, I had to move. Mellon had been one of the oldest banks in the city, that still had its original bank vault underground. It had been small, but perfect. Books lining the walls from oldest to newest, then broken down further by genre. Random trinkets found here and there hung from the drawers along the walls, and a shelf of unbroken picture frames would have been visible from my pallet.

Would I ever go home, again?

I laid back against the soft mattress and closed my eyes, while the pressure in my chest deepened. I tried evening out my breath, but it only came quicker.

One. I'm probably never going home.

Two. Finally, I'm not alone, and I'm still all alone.

Three. Am I ok?

Tears were falling from my eyes fairly easily. I tried to stop them, but they kept falling as the panic continued to rise.

How long had I been alone? Hoping to one day find someone like me? To find anyone like me. Just to know I wasn't alone. And instead, I'm caught by the one set of individuals I'd never fit in with. The one group that not only were genetically superior to me but had been known for not tolerating my kind.

Yes, they've been pleasant enough, but how long is that going to last? Until they realize I know nothing...? And Nan? Instruction? What did any of that mean?

I continued trying to quell the panic when the clicking of the door sounded. I got to my feet quickly, using the soft material of my sleeve to wipe my eyes.

I cleared the tears from my vision enough to see Ren filling up the small entrance.

Fuck.

He inhaled deeply and moved closer, until he was within arm's reach. I struggled to quiet the panic still threatening to spill out of me.

"You're upset," the dark tone of his voice fell over me and I closed my eyes against the unavoidable truth. We were alone, in this small, dim room. The most interaction I'd had with anyone in years was with this menacing creature and I illogically craved more.

To be so close and still so far away from basic human interaction was debilitating.

One. Stop thinking

Two. Stop thinking.

Three. Stop-

The thoughts in my mind disappeared altogether.

I felt a strong grip close around my arms and my eyes shot back open. Ren's gaze was on my face and I could see my reflection in the visor again.

As much as I should have felt uncomfortable and as much as I should have pulled away, I couldn't.

It wasn't him forcing me to remain still; I just didn't want to move.

He pulled me slowly against his chest and wrapped his arms around me. My hands remained pinned to my sides, but I relaxed my neck and leaned it gently against his broad chest.

He was warm, and smelled like power and fire mixed together. I inhaled deeply and lifted my hands to his elbows.

Ren was a violent, bloody man. I knew that was an accurate assessment. He didn't become the leader of this organization by votes or speeches. It was simply from conquest.

Those facts should have been enough to strengthen my resolve to turn away from the comfort he was showing me.

Why is he showing me comfort? I couldn't make sense of anything. For all the reasons I should have feared him, and more, I still could not bring myself to try and move away.

"No one is going to hurt you," he said quietly, as his arms tightened around me. The modulator had distorted his voice, but with my head on his chest, I heard the slight rumble of his true voice.

I closed my eyes again and slid my hands from his elbows to his hips. Even through the thick warm material of his uniform, I could feel the hard lines of his body.

What does he look like, underneath...?

As soon as the thought left my mind, embarrassment filled my cheeks, and I stiffened. A low groan sounded deep in his chest followed by a slight chuckle. One hand shifted upwards to the nape of my neck while the other splayed across the lower part of my back.

His hands were so big. I could feel the width of his hand on my back and took a tiny step closer, further burying myself in his existence.

I forced myself to focus on the feeling of the texture of his uniform against my face, to obscure any further thoughts. But it only ignited a deeper desire for more.

I should have been afraid of how very terrifying he was. All evidence pointed to the very real danger that existed in his world.

Maybe there's something wrong with me... where is my sense of self-preservation?

His grasp on me loosened and he took a step back. He lifted his hand, extending it towards my face and I leaned slightly away, not sure what he was meaning to do. He stopped, brought the extended hand back to his chest and pulled off the leather glove. His skin was a smooth beige. His fingers were long and beautiful, and I could see the bulging, strong veins that flowed over his back of his hand leading to his powerful knuckles.

I inhaled and looked back up to the black mask and somehow the red cracks seemed to burn brighter. He lifted his hand slowly to my face; I did not recoil this time. Instead, my vision blurred and my lips parted. The warmth of his hand penetrated my senses and I closed my eyes as his large hand enveloped my cheek. The warmth within him flowing through the ice in my veins.

I was idly intrigued by the roughness of his hand. His thumb traced over my cheek, wiping away the remnants of my tears and I felt the world shift around me. His skin felt so good against mine.

Just right...

A light beeping noise came from his pocket, which prompted him to remove his hand from my face and replace the glove. He quieted the noise and turned to leave.

I took a steadying breath, preparing to calm my nerves when he turned at the last moment.

"There is much that needs to be addressed," he looked back at me, "I will return soon."

Then he was gone.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **So, this story isn't going to be following a specific pattern. I think it's very much going to be character driven, so the POV will change randomly. Which will also affect the length, but in the immortal words of Heath, "Here. We. Go."**

"...but even if we were to retake the Capital, we still wouldn't have enough defenses to hold it."

"Right, but we also don't have enough intel to accurately determine exactly what is there!"

"Is that a risk we want to take?"

"Isn't it!? We can't stay here."

I remained silent, considering their arguments. In truth, however, I was distracted.

It had taken me a considerable amount of time to control my abilities; to only be able to hear the thoughts of those I wanted to. But she was completely different. Despite my effort and concentration, I was still able to pick up her thoughts. Even now, though I was a few floors away, I could still catch the light tremor of her voice.

She was wondering about Jitte and his role with The Order, she was tired, but most of all she was anxious. 

As the voices of my commanders and leadership continued to argue, I concentrated on her anxiety.

She was anxious about my return. 

I was intrigued.

I closed my eyes and focused on her alone. She was appraising the garments in the closet. All standard issue for new recruits. Having settled on a large dressing shirt, she began peeling off the grey uniform and before putting it on, stepped in front of the mirror in the restroom. 

My mouth went dry. As she contemplated her reflection, I could only appreciate it. There had been no indication that all of this was what lie beneath her scavenger garb. The curve of her neck elegantly flowed toward her shoulders, over the gentle curve of her stomach and the back out over her hips. The smooth trail of skin from her throat, over her collar bone and over the perfect swell of her breasts. The perfect mounds that puckered in response to the chill in the air.

Damnit...

She was fucking edible, and she had no idea. Unable to follow any more of the mindless noise regarding expansion, I stood; stepping behind my chair to hide the uncomfortable tent forming. 

"I've heard your arguments and will take the evening to decide our next course of action." They nodded in agreement and began filing out.

I clenched my fists as I struggled to remain patient while the rest of the room emptied. Everyone except, Hux of course.

He remained seated, looking at me; waiting for me to address him. In the interest of saving time, I peered into his thoughts.

He can't keep that pathetic creature here. He could at least put her in a cell, where she belongs. My men shouldn't have to tolerate-

I'd heard enough.

"General, you seem displeased with our detainee."

"Sir." His voice was dripping with self-righteous indignation. Detainee? Really? Not prisoner?

Even his thoughts were irksome.

"General," I paused and moved around towards him, "you would do well to remember your place," I whispered. 

His scowl intensified and he straightened his spine.

"My place is-"his voice cut out in a half choke as I mentally tightened my grip on his throat. His pale skin began turning the same shade of bright red as his hair and I felt his panic rise.

"I will tell you what your place is, General." I held on a moment longer, then released him. He fell on the table, gasping for air and clutching his throat. 

Once he was able to catch his breath, he stood straight again, and returned to his intense glare. Through gritted teeth, he quietly replied, "Yes, sir."

Enough time had been wasted on his meaningless concern, but unfortunately the desire that had been spiking through me before was gone. 

Anger was the accelerant that carried me back to my quarters. Anger at Hux for his impertinence and at her for distracting me. 

Hux wasn't wrong. Every other human we'd encountered had been fodder on which our Order had expanded. 

'Humans are weak, and they need our guidance. They need us to end their meaningless existence.' The words spoken by Snoke, not long ago, echoed through my mind. 'Are you weak, boy?' 

My jaw tightened as rage enveloped my mind. I felt the tremors building through my arms and down my legs. I reached for the latches on the helmet and ripped it off as quickly as possible. The cold air against my face was welcome but did nothing to stop the spasms ripping through my body. I took a deep breath and fell over the table, upon exhale. 

How was it, that even from the grave Snoke's influence propelled me further into darkness? The icy grip of hate continued to curl around my neck, choking me into submission. I shook so hard and felt my grip on reality begin to dissolve. The darkness was pulling me down and I couldn't breathe. 

Caught in the illusion that was never ending pain and self-denial, I clenched my fists tighter. The unyielding leather cutting into my circulation the harder I squeezed. After everything I'd sacrificed to be worthy of his pride, it still had not mattered in the end. It was never going to be enough. 

So I ended him. I ended Snoke before he could force me to kill off more of who I was. 

But who are you? I wasn't Resistance, but I wasn't entirely The Order either. The battle between metas and humans, it was irrational and yet, I couldn't let go of the psychological vice Snoke still had around my mind. 

The mantle I had meant to destroy now rested squarely on my shoulders. Sweat was dripping down the ends of my hair as I struggled to quiet my mind. Losing control was not an option, but I was drowning again.

Something crashed against the floor and I turned to realize my tremors were rocking the entire room. 

Weak, weak, WEAK! 

The spiral down intensified, like the crushing depths of an ocean the deeper you sank. The pressure began to reach critical and an alarm sounded somewhere in the distance. I opened my eyes to see a crack beginning to split the concrete wall. Reaching deep within myself, I struggle to find an anchor. Anything to push me back into control. I felt the room spin around me. Objects were shattering around me as I continued to dig for something; anything to quiet the emotion. 

I couldn't breath while I continued to dig, until at last I found something that didn't belong. It wasn't much, but a small glimmer of something pierced through the sinking black. I reached for it, not knowing what it was or where it had come from, but anything to grab onto was what I needed. My breathing slowed and I closed my eyes to focus on the tiny emotion pushing against the edge of my mind. 

Confusion. Exhaustion. Something familiar... Anxiety.

I turned to the door and felt it stronger.

I went to it quickly and the doors slid apart; revealing her.


	5. Fireflies

Chaos erupted everywhere. 

People were running in every direction; yelling to one another and straining to hear above the loud ringing of an alarm. 

No one paid attention to me, as I had changed into one of the generic uniforms hanging in the closet. I had been contemplating going to sleep when it occurred to me Ren had promised to be back. If I was going to be alone with him again, I didn't want it to be in the threadbare night dress, or the form fitting grey ensemble. 

So, when the door to my room opened automatically to the sounding of the alarm, I did not hesitate. Once I stepped foot into the busy hallway, I simply followed the people dressed in my similarly colored uniform.

I strained to hear the conversations around me, but the most I could catch were words like, "losing control" and "again". 

I went to one of the open elevators and shoved in with a group of people. They were all either deep in conversation or urgently typing on their wrist monitors. No one seemed to notice me. 

Maybe I can escape...

As soon as the thought occurred to me, I felt a jolt of adrenaline and purpose. I didn't belong here with these people. The photos were tucked safely back in my boot and I had the small bags that had been in the metal box. 

All the other questions, the stuff about Nan and my parents... It didn't really matter. They were all gone anyways, and information wasn't going to help me survive. I looked at the faces of the people in the elevator and knew I didn't fit in with any of them. Everyone of them, because of their powers, had chosen to be here.

I didn't belong.

The elevator slowed to a stop on level 5. 

I just need to follow the evacuation in place, stay away from anyone in black helmets and I should be able to slip away. 

As I stepped out of the elevator with everyone else, the concrete floor beneath us shook. I was prepared to run at any second, should the floor give way from beneath me. I shuddered to think of what was powerful enough to send shockwaves through the concrete, stone, and steel. 

From further down the hall I could hear people shouting over the wailing sirens to get clear of level 5, immediately. The group began to run.

I was about to run with them when something tugged against me. I looked down at my hands and they shook, involuntarily. I tried again to move towards the exit, but an unseen rope tugged in the pit of my stomach. 

I'd only felt this pull once before, and had elected to ignore it. 

Considering how different things might've turned out then, had I followed the alien instinct, I couldn't ignore it again. I closed my eyes, squared my shoulders, and turned towards the pull.

I went slowly down the empty corridor and allowed the pull to guide me. After rounding a few more vacated hallways, and feeling hopelessly lost in the labyrinth, I felt the tug disappear. 

The sirens weren't as loud here. 

Not sure where I was, I looked around the vestibule, realizing this area was far more elegant than any others I'd seen. The walls were still a mixture of stone and concrete, but in them were carved the most intricate reliefs. The floor was a dark marble grey and I was surrounded by black, double blast doors. 

My appreciation for the room was cut short as a massive cracking noise dramatically worsened the tremors I had grown accustomed to. I hurried to the middle door, away from the center of the room, then the trembling floor calmed.

Not even a second had passed and the heavy doors I stood in front of pulled apart.

An audible gasp escaped, and my eyes widened in surprise. 

The first thing I saw was his eyes. 

They were a rich, profound hazel, framed by long black lashes. The deep-set, monolid shape to them made him appear somewhat sad. But the dark drawn together quality of his eyebrows hinted at his anger instead. His nose was long and somewhat awkward, but his lips were thick and mesmerizing. A series of asymmetrical moles dotted his face along with a smattering of freckles. A faint scar ran from his left eye down over his perfect cheek. 

My entire assessment of him had only lasted a few seconds, but it was enough to take my breath away. His thick raven black hair fell to his shoulders in waves, but pieces of it stuck to his forehead and neck. He was sweating, struggling somehow. 

I managed to tear my eyes from his face long enough to take in the dramatic black uniform, complete with leather gloves. 

Ren!

He reached forward, grabbed my arm, and pulled me inside. 

I turned around the barren white and silver room to notice broken glass and shards of wood all over the floor. Across the room, I saw a significant crack in the foundation that trailed up through the wall and almost to the ceiling. 

Did he do this...?

"Why are you here?" His voice was a smooth, deep baritone that was almost melodic without being disguised by the synthesizer in his helmet. "Answer me," he said gruffly.

I jerked slightly in response to the violence in his voice.

"I don't know," I decided to go with a partial truth, "I was following everyone out when..."

"You were trying to escape," his tone was final. 

I darted my eyes back up to his and glared. How tiresome it must have been to have to work with him every day. Knowing you had nothing secret for yourself. 

I looked over the destruction in his room and ignored the logic to remain quiet.

"Yes," I said firmly, "I saw the opportunity, so I took it." I clamped my jaw shut and waited.

He straightened his shoulders which added inches to his height. He lifted his hands and ran them through his hair; it fell back into a perfect frame around his face. 

I gulped.

"Yet you're here." I didn't speak. "Why is that, I wonder," he said darkly. He wasn't asking me, but even if he had I wasn't going to answer. Instead I focused on the damage surrounding us; ignoring the truth completely. 

My defense seemed to work as I noticed his eye twitch in annoyance, but victory was short lived. He took a step closer to me and the same pull from earlier began throbbing again.

Confusion filled my mind. Confusion followed quickly by confirmation. I looked around and noticed the debris and damage spiraled around the room, everywhere. 

Everywhere, except a small radius that he was currently standing in. 

"You did this. You're the reason for the..." my voice trailed off as I realized what the rope had been tied to. 

It was him. I recalled the words I'd heard before, "losing control and again." How many times had this happened before? Why couldn't he keep control? 

Ren moved so quickly; I would have missed it entirely had I blinked. 

He was leaning down, glaring into my eyes. 

"You've been nothing but trouble, since I found you," he glowered. My jaw tightened in response.

Like I asked to be here, like I asked for you to kidnap me! I knew he heard my thoughts dripping in sarcasm. I wanted him to hear it.

His nose was long and slightly crooked. What should have been an imperfection only strengthened the beauty of his masculine face. 

His large hands were on me again, in a flash; the speed and force of which stunned me. 

Without understanding, I suddenly felt overcome with fear and anguish; weak and out of control. The weight of something was crushing me. I couldn't breathe. Everywhere darkness, fear, pain. Such deep pain. Except...

There was something, pushing against everything else. Something tiny and weak. It rose from the pit of my stomach and shimmied up through the darkness like a lone firefly struggling to illuminate the night. I strained to understand what it was when instantly everything vanished.

I gasped for air and realized Ren had released me from his grip. 

The black was gone.

He looked from his hands back up to me, perplexed.

Was that him? Had I felt...him?

"How did you..."

"I don't know," he cut me off.

Before I could contemplate it further, he had stepped back into my circle and put his hands on me again. There was no stillness or compassion to his action. Just instant connection, unbothered by feeling. He gripped my arms tightly, locking me in his grasp. 

I felt nothing. No fear, no pain, no black; nothing but his strong fingers digging into my flesh.

We stood like that for a moment. He was hurting me, but I was too curious to push him away. His breathing was rough and fell in warm waves over my face. Droplets of sweat began to push through his skin and he closed his eyes. 

I let out a small groan; the circulation was slowing in my hands. But with his eyes closed, I could really look at his face. So strange that someone so dangerous was so breathtakingly beautiful. Was that why he wore the mask?

I could feel the bruises settling along my arms, under his grip. The problem was I didn't want him to let me go.

Instead, the warm glow in my lower belly from before began to throb again and I realized what it was.

Desire.

I'd never known a man. Had never been aware of what that even felt like. The desire to just be in contact with someone was all I had craved. But this... This longing within me...

I felt tiny and ignorant, trying to put a name to an irrational emotion.

He opened his eyes again; I was so close I could see my reflection within the powerful gradience of them. His eyes were a grayish green around the edges, that seeped into the warm pool of light brown surrounding the retina. 

He was glaring at me, and I felt the desire deepen. I was so confused I wanted to sob. There was nothing to help me understand what I wanted, but I wanted it more than anything. My gaze lowered to the rough pink of his lips.

His voice was ragged and strained, "You don't understand what you're asking." His gaze had fallen to my lips in return.

I may not understand, I thought, but I doubt you do either.

No sooner had the thought left my mind, his mouth was on mine. I would have fallen back from the force, but his hands were still holding me tightly against him. 

My eyes were still open, and I could see stress lines across his face begin to dissolve. I closed my eyes and tried to stop thinking of how odd this was. 

Not odd that it was happening, but odd that I felt like I wanted it; wanted more. He was...kissing me and as inexperienced as I was, I felt something that didn't fit the scenario. It was akin to hunger, but not for food.

He was moving his lips against mine and I concentrated on remaining pliable beneath him. Ren moved in a way that felt so urgent and dark. I'd had nothing to compare it to but was nonetheless moved to try and match his fervor. 

His hands fell away from my arms and onto my back. He was pulling me against him so tightly. My arms were above his, so I wrapped them around his shoulders. The width of which blew my mind. His massive size, that had intimidated me before, only spurned the hunger I didn't know existed until now. 

When he tilted his head, wisps of his hair brushed against my arms and I wanted to feel more. I moved my fingers from his shoulders up through the nape of his neck and let my fingers graze against the smooth texture of his thick. slightly damp waves.

A small moan involuntarily escaped from my throat in appreciation for this mercurial man but was quickly swallowed by his mouth. I felt his warm tongue slide along the seam of my lips and tiny electric shocks went off below the surface of my skin. 

Slightly surprised by the bold and novel sensation, my lips parted, and he slipped further into my mouth. I should have been disgusted, but again I only wanted more.

I closed my fists, gripping his thick hair and pulled myself against him, harder. His hands on my back split; one sliding up toward the nape of my neck and the other curving around me further and to grip my hip. 

Hunger, desire, need and something else boiled below the surface. The blackness encroached on the fringes of my mind but the connection was keeping it at bay. 

The blackness...

The blackness? The connection. I was feeling him again. He was filling my mind, but not overpowering me. 

I wanted it, too. I wanted more. 

He wanted more.

Soon I felt confident enough to push my tongue back against his and follow his example. I swirled mine against his then traced it along the curve of his bottom lip. 

The soft swell of it was so enticing and without thinking I pulled it between my lips and began sucking. I felt his desire spike, exponentially and his grip around me tightened. 

I was already out of breath, but the sudden tightening only intensified my labored breathing. 

Ren was filling my senses to the point I felt weightless. There was nothing else around me but him. Almost like a magnet, forcing me against him that was only gaining power. 

Power. That's what he tasted like. Raw power. 

Ren broke the connection with a loud smack, and I felt dizzy. My head swirled and I struggled to focus.

All I saw was Ren. His eyes dark and lips swollen. I worked to unfurl my fingers in his hair, but realized I was wrapped around him more thoroughly than that.

His hand was still at the nap of my neck, but his other was planted beneath my bottom. I looked down to realize not only had I locked my legs around his waist, but we were floating. 

He seemed just as surprised as me, for he was scanning the room as well. The debris from earlier was floating; suspended peacefully all around us and slowly spinning. 

I looked back to him and was met with his equally inquisitive gaze. 

I felt him. How...?

I'm... I thought; but he finished in a whispered, "only human."

________________________________________________________________

**I really hope you guys like this. Comments and votes are completely welcome and appreciated!**


	6. Books Never Could

I committed the lines of his face to my memory.

This wasn't going to last forever. These strange emotions emanating from him was not a reliable indication of anything, really.

I searched the unique depths of his eyes for something to say. It was the most awkward situation I'd ever been in, yet I felt more at peace and comfort in his arms, than I'd ever felt before.

His stoic face gave nothing away, and I tried to wiggle free.

I forced my mind to consider the facts. This is too much. You shouldn't feel this way. You're being emotional.

His grip on the fleshy part of my upper thigh tightened significantly and he inhaled sharply.

"Please." His tone was clipped but entreating. Something in my chest hurt at his simple plea. I ran my finger gently over the light pink scar on his cheek.

Nan had always told me to keep my mind busy, should anything happen to him. 'If your mind goes, everything goes...' And sitting in his arms, with my legs around him, I thought about a story I'd read years ago. I couldn't remember the specifics, but the little boy grew up surrounded by people that didn't understand him; and tried to tame him. His story was tragic and lonely, and tortured. My heart had ached for him the same way it ached for Ren, now.

Suddenly his grip around me disappeared and I fell out of his embrace.

"I am not Heathcliff," his shoulders were squared, and the severe demeanor of his face mimicked the lifeless features of his helmet. I glanced over and saw it still sat in a spot-lighted pit of ash, untouched from his earlier rampage. "Your pity irritates me."

His words cut through me and I felt embarrassed, but only for a moment. What ever was torturing him was calling to me somehow. I didn't know much about mutants, but I knew enough to understand the connection couldn't have come from me.

Whatever strange psychic connection we shared was triggering my feelings. I had no control over his ability to hear me any more than I had control over what those feelings were. It irked me that he considered my empathy as something to abhor.

"What is your fucking problem?" I whispered. He was close enough to hear me clearly, but there was no reply. I pushed past him to leave, fully aware I had no clue where I was headed or how to get back out without the pull guiding me. If he couldn't accept my basic humanity, then what was the point?

Before I could make it to the threshold, his massive hands were on me again, whipping me around. Without hesitation or consideration, he pulled my face to his and drank from me.

I shoved against his shoulders, not entirely wanting this, but not entirely hating it either.

My mind swirled with questions that needed answering and emotions that needed understanding but still the violence in his lips was all consuming.

I was fully aware of the moment this time. I was aware of him lifting me and my legs instinctively wrapping around him. My arms wound around his neck and his hands dug into my ass.

A groan of appreciation left his lips but was swallowed by mine. His grip tightened.

The pressure inside of me was building, but to what I wasn't certain. I knew the medical side of sex, and was aware of the implied satisfaction from it, but had never once thought I'd crave what all those authors had written about...

The heat between my legs was intensifying and soon I couldn't get enough of Ren. His hands were still in the leather gloves, but now they were roaming as I clung to him. They were sliding up my back, beneath the fabric of my shirt wisps of fire licked up the trail his hands were blazing.

I rocked my hip to inch up higher and lost my hold around his neck. His hands left my back and caught me. His lips had stopped moving and we stared at each other with the unspoken question hanging in the air.

My legs were wrapped around his hips now and I felt a rock-hard ridge of something pressed against the delicious heat spreading through me.

Realization hit me. Is that his...

The darkness in his eyes burned through me and he squeezed me harder. He wasn't moving; postponing long enough to let me decide what I wanted. His mercurial behavior had been overwhelming, and this was the most nonsensical thing to do with my captor, but fuck if he didn't feel so good.

I slid minutely over his piercing member in response.

"Are you sure," the darkness in his eyes vanished for a moment and he looked innocent. "I may not be able to stop..."

I should have been afraid. I should have released him and went back to my plan of escape. I knew he wasn't saying that just to make his self appear more desirable. It was a genuine warning.

I searched his eyes, trying to weigh the pros and cons of involving myself further, but I concluded that my list wouldn't have mattered anyways. The pull I felt toward him was too strong.

I ran my hand over his cheek again, up through his already tousled hair and pulled his face back down to mine.

I kissed him gently, and he seemed to follow my lead; but that didn't last long. Ren changed pace and was back to assaulting my mouth with his; taking everything I had to offer.

I was dizzy and lost in his touch when he planted me back on my feet and abruptly ended the kiss. At first, I was confused, but then he took my hand and forced me to follow him. His quarters were significantly large and elegant, but I had no time to really consider the few items that did fill the space. He pushed through the door at the end of the hallway and in the center of the dark grey and white room was a huge bed.

It made sense since he was such a large man.

Ren spun me around to face the bed. His rigid erection was pressing unyieldingly against my ass and the warm sensations continued to flood my body. He moved his hands over my hips and up over my belly. I felt his breath, warm against the back of my neck followed by the soft sensation of his lips. I tilted my had back in response and closed my eyes.

I'd never read about it feeling like this...

He laughed in response to my thought.

"I'm going to show you things," he whispered against my neck, "that your books never could." I was mesmerized by the dark quality of his voice and rocked my hips against him.

"There's a good girl." His fingers dug into my hips harder and I was overcome with a sense of need. As to what I needed, I wasn't sure, but I wanted him to supply that need more than life itself.

"Ravenous little girl," he hummed in appreciation. He pulled on the end of my braid and worked his way up until my hair was loose and falling around me. His face was pressed into my scalp and I felt his fingers gliding through its length.

He stepped away from behind me and I immediately missed his presence.

"Turn around," his voice was raw and clipped.

I obeyed and considered the dark look in his eyes. He was mesmerizing.

"Sit on the bed and unbutton your shirt." My eyes widened in response, but still I didn't hesitate. I sat on the soft edge of the mattress and made quick work with the buttons of the uniform. I didn't remove it, but it did hang open, exposing the cotton bra I'd been issued.

My skin warmed beneath his roaming eyes. I remembered disrobing in front of Roz and Tes without fear. I wasn't afraid in front of Ren, but I was conscious of things I hadn't been before.

"So fucking beautiful..." he whispered, and almost instantly he was in front of me.

There was nothing sweet in his lips, now. His hands were no longer slow and considerate, and his force was anything but gentle.

I lay flat on the bed and his leather gloves moved over my body. I melted into the smooth sheets while his mouth glided over my sensitive skin. I arched my back in response to the mixture of his soft lips and rough gloves.

He was laying on his side next to me, looking down at me when his free hand began its journey down; slipping beneath the waistline of my pants and even further past the elastic in my underwear.

My breath hitched slightly, and I looked down to try and watch what he was doing.

"No, no," he commanded, "eyes stay on me." I looked back up to him and felt the smooth leather of his gloves playing with the folds of my labia.

A sigh of contentment left his lips, "Feel how easily my fingers glide over you?" I nodded in response to the tingling sensations radiating from my core. "That's because you're already wet for me. Your sweet pussy wants me."

I felt my face redden and he smiled darkly at me.

"Say it." I knew what he was referring to, but I wasn't sure I could. I'd never heard or spoken slang terms for sexual organs like this, before. Beyond 'ass' everything else had medical terms. "I'm waiting..."

I took a deep breath.

"My ah-," I swallowed, "my pussy wants you..." I whimpered. The word sounded odd coming from my mouth, but the way he shut his eyes and exhaled slightly in response made me want to please him more.

His fingers swirled over a sensitive spot eliciting spontaneous spasms. The rough seams of the leather gloves raked against my walls and soft spots that had never been touched before and I reached out to grab anything to steady myself.

I gripped his wrist, holding on tightly, needing him to slow down. The sensations rippling through me were foreign and so overwhelming. I felt like I'd combust and melt simultaneously.

"Ren... fuck, please. Please," I had no idea was I was begging for. For him to stop? For him to never stop? I just felt lost in a twisting kaleidoscope of fire and pleasure, and I had no idea how I was going to finally land.

The roar in my head was deafening and my mouth was agape as I struggled to contain the moans escaping from my mouth. He only continued to grind his fingers into the sensitive heat. He leaned over me, the ends of his hair falling like a dark curtain around us and slid his warm tongue into my open mouth. I closed my eyes and let go of his wrist to wrap around his neck.

I spread my legs wider, hoping he'd lead me to whatever conclusion I needed to find (I wasn't sure how much more I could handle). He laughed into my mouth.

"Innocent, human girl... you have no idea." His tone was lascivious. I really didn't know what he meant, but I forced myself to stop thinking and focus on the swirl of his delicious tongue back in my mouth.

He hit a spot I hadn't felt yet, and I cried out, but the sound was swallowed up by him. Panting and lost in his touch, I felt myself teetering on the edge of something, when he yanked his hand away, so quickly.

Shocked by the sudden disappearance, a whine flew from my lips, but only for a second because he had slipped my pants down over my hips to my knees. Only a moment later, I blushed as he set his self free from his pants.

He was staring at my face, and I knew he was hearing my nerves.

"Tell me where this should go, tiny human..." I lifted my eyes back up to him. I was nervous, but only because of the size. As I understood his warning from before, he licked his lips. I couldn't speak.

"I'll tell you where, then." He moved back slightly, lifted my legs, still bound together by my pants, and laid them over his shoulder.

The naked sections of my thighs brushed against the severe wool of his uniform and I blushed. He was still fully clothed, with only his penis exposed.

"Dick, little girl. Say it." He watched me.

"D-Dick." I said aloud.

He angled the head between the folds of my pussy and hovered.

"Open your mouth, little girl," he whispered, leaning down towards me – causing the muscles in the back of my legs to stretch.

I obeyed and whispered against my mouth, "This cock is going to fill this fucking cunt, do you understand?" I nodded; not sure I would've been able to speak.

"You'll have to answer me, little girl." He pulled my bottom lip into his mouth and sucked hard.

"Yes, sir."

He released my lip with a resounding pop and slammed his self into me.

I screamed out, fisting for something to anchor me. His hands found mine and he remained completely still, letting my body adjust to the sudden and overwhelming impaling.

"Fucking shit," he groaned against my lips, "so fucking tight." His breath was ragged and coming in short bursts. The raw burn in my pussy ebbed and pulsed like a timer as I slowly, slowly adjusted to the delicious pain coursing through my body.

Fucking, fucking shiiiit... My eyes rolled in the back of my head as he continued panting, struggling not to move. The raw sting in my pussy was slowly fading, and the pain morphed from unbearable to somewhat delicious.

My fingers dug into his shoulders when he started moving ever so slowly. With each inch he pushed in then back out, I hiccuped a moan and a slight scream in response. It didn't take much longer till my thoughts were focused on the lovely fullness I felt.

I started feeling peace. Perfect peace...

I closed my eyes as the sweet emotion overwhelmed me to the point of tears. Everything I'd been through began to fade away... I wasn't alone anymore. Even if it was only for a moment, someone's arms were around me and I felt the connection with something other than hate.

I opened my eyes as his thrusts grew stronger and the heat from his face pressed into my neck intensified.

Hate? I didn't hate...?

I was sensing him again. And with every flash of the dark emotions surrounding him, his hips slammed into me harder. 

I should have felt pain, but I was overwhelmed with his emotion, too. The pounding was unstoppable, and it was getting significantly harder to breath.

Ren gripped my hips and pushed my lower body up. He was on his knees, still holding my legs to one side, over his shoulder; he was leaning into me now. The weight of his massive body and my legs pushing into my diaphragm cut off my ability to take a deep breath.

Between the inability to breath and the feeling of his cock trying to split me in two, the pressure began building again, deep in my core.

I didn't try to fight the emotions I felt swirling around me anymore. I stopped trying to determine if they were coming from him or from me, and I quieted my mind as the sound of his hips beating into me increased.

It was building to the point I couldn't think, and my lack of air was furthering the electric jolts. I was breathless and lost in him.

Ren, Ren, Ren... REN! I was screaming in my mind. I was about to explode.

He growled and turned, stepping off the bed, keeping his self buried deep inside me. I screamed at the sudden change in depth and pressure.

"Grab onto my arms and don't let go," he commanded gruffly. I obeyed immediately.

He put his hands behind my back and lifted my upper body off the bed. With my legs still over his shoulder and him cradling my upper body, he bounced me back and forth on his dick and I screwed my eyes shut as I had no breath to scream.

The shocks were quickening and pushing something towards explosion. My fingers dug through the thick material at his arms and I felt his leather clad fingers dig into my hips.

"Yes, tiny human, cum for me..." I didn't understand his words, but something deep within me did. This must have been the orgasm, but that word didn't feel strong enough to describe what was happening to me.

He groaned out curses as his thrusts slowed but intensified significantly in power. It felt as if he were trying to pierce my heart.

"Cum, now!" He roared, and as if I had control over it, I obeyed. My eyes clamped shut and he growled again, "eyes on me!"

I looked up to him as fire spread through my entire body all at once. I struggled to keep my eyes from blurring. I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe; I could only feel, and it was him.

I only felt him.

He was pushing me higher and higher as the world around me spiraled and I was flying. He was flying. He was soaring above me, higher. He had never felt so complete.

His face turned murderous as his grip intensified to the point of pain. He was slowing further, shaking with me still in his arms until finally he calmed; clutching me against him.

After a moment of heavy breathing, Ren gently pulled his still impressive length from me and laid me on my side. I winced at the enormous absence I felt upon his departure, both physical and mental.

He turned to me, lifting his hand to my exposed hip and was about to say something when a loud pounding sounded at his door.

Both of our heads whipped towards the noise, then back to each other.

Shit.


	7. Behind the Veil

After the doors shut, Vicrul removed his helmet. It was custom for knights to keep their faces hidden, but in Vicrul's case, it was quite necessary. He was the same height as me, but his face was very attractive. It was a big reason I was glad to have control over hearing other's thoughts. If his face was uncovered when females were near, the explicit and unoriginal thoughts would be overwhelming.

"What the fuck?" He was the only person I would allow to speak so informally to me.

Vic was empathic. He was able to sense and absorb the abilities of other metas.

"I lost control," I said flatly, knowing that's what he was referring to.

"No shit, Ren." He walked through the main living quarters and surveyed the damage to the structure. "I was meeting with Hux and Veers when I collapsed."

I was significantly more powerful than him; under normal circumstances he could absorb powers, at his discretion. But, when I lost control, I overpowered him.

Like she was able to do to me...

My emotions were not as controlled as they should have been; the tone of her thoughts continued to drift to me. She was thinking about her thoroughly wrecked pussy; which made my cock stiffen at the thought.

"What's going on?" Vicrul interrupted my thoughts. I wasn't sure what he was picking up on, so I pushed against the boundaries of his mind. My temper, or lack thereof was concerning him.

Oddly enough, it annoyed me; how he thought something was off because I wasn't in a rampage.

"The council is wanting to expand and take D.C.," I spoke; distracting him. "I'm contemplating that. There's only so much we can do from here, but..."

"But that will be challenging Snoke's remaining zealots," he finished my thought. "That's what Veers and I were discussing. Hux seems to think there may be a greater advantage to remaining here."

"It's going to have to be done at some point," I murmured, "the only reason they haven't attacked first is because we're stronger. But if what we have discovered is true, they are working on enhancing theirs."

"That's not sustainable," he stepped closer to me, lowering his voice.

"Yes, I know. But it wouldn't need to be sustainable to wipe us out." I considered the danger of both scenarios when her thoughts pierced through, again.

Her hips were pulsing in pain and every time she moved, the muscles in her back and arms protested. I'm going to have bruises all over, she thought.

I needed to get her out of here and back to her quarters. She wasn't sustainable here.

"We need to meet," I said unhurriedly. "Let them know and we will meet in a few hours. Night should have already begun, so a patrol isn't necessary. We'll meet in the lower levels." I walked with him towards the doors.

"Very good," he replied, and was gone.

I stood a moment longer, looking at the broken fragments of glass and splinters still covering the floor.

Weak.

As much as I hated Snoke, he was right. I was weak. I was continually letting emotions cloud my ability to be who I needed to be. Between his memory and now her presence, I was not being the Commander. I was not applying my vision to fix this world.

I glanced down the hall to the closed door. She was impairing my vision.

Anger coursed through my veins as I reached for the helmet.

*****

The door burst open, bouncing off the wall behind it with a loud smack.

Ren filled the doorway; head to toe a mirage of black. The helmet was back in place and for some reason relief coursed through me.

I stood, slightly aware of the fact he was finished with me.

There was no movement; he didn't seem to be breathing. Just an enigmatic statue looming in the middle of my only exit.

An odd wave of embarrassment washed over me as I considered the shirt that was still open, exposing my skin. I made quick work closing the buttons then pushed the tails into the slacks, and clasped it shut as well.

Not once breaking eye contact, I stepped forward; not afraid, but not entirely confidant, either. The heat from before was gone. I didn't need to see his beautiful face or touch his perfect skin to understand his intense need was no longer present.

"One left, two rights, another left, then straight. Someone will find you," his voice was low and distorted again through the helmet.

Ren was telling me how to get out of here without it being known I was here, at all.

I should have felt used. I should have felt tainted in many ways, but I didn't. In all honesty, I only felt relief.

He stepped to the side and allowed me to pass. I twisted my hips to avoid touching him and felt a sharp ache pierce through my muscles. A quick flash of him trying to split me in two, and his hands digging into my flesh filled my mind; I salivated involuntarily.

He must have seen that, because just as quickly as the thought ran through my mind, he halted my steps. I was frozen in place with an invisible force constricting me.

"Control your thoughts," he enunciated each word.

After another moment I felt the vice around me disappear. I remained in the same spot, staring into the onyx eyes of his mask, then without another word, continued to the exit. 

Once the doors clicked behind me and I let out my breath.

Forcing the memories down, I began the journey back to my "room". Considering everything that had just happened, I should have had more of a reaction. I idly wondered if I was in shock. 

I considered how strange the loss of my innocence did not affect me. I had no feelings about being taken so violently; I had no feelings about having sex, at all. Furthermore, the absence of resentment I should have felt only advanced my curiosity. 

Instead of finding all these damaging emotions, I just continued to experience relief.

Why am I so relieved?

Voices pulled me from my dislodged state of contemplation. I realized, rather quickly, I had been so deep in thought I'd missed a turn, or possibly made one I shouldn't have. I ended up at a stair well and decided to descend. That was the general direction I needed to go, anyways.

I reached the next level and stood in front of the blast door. There was no keypad, so it wasn't authorized access only. I waved my hands, trying to activate a sensor and the door slid up into the wall.

A figure draped in black stood there, blocking my path, my heart quickened. Another knight.

Not my knight, I thought, then quickly banished the idea.

I could tell from his helmet I hadn't encountered this one yet. He was slightly shorter in stature, but a bit more intimidating. The eyes of the helmet were slits and instead of being a deep, matte black, it was a dull dark platinum. What appeared to be Asian markings decorated the side of the mask, starting at the crown and going down over the jaw. It had similar qualities to Ren's. Instead of the bright red jagged lines, there were thick, black slashes across the weathered surface. The intimidation I felt stemmed from the implications of those gashes; this knight was a violent one. 

I waited for him to say something to me, but he never did.

"I'm not sure where I'm supposed to be," I began, trying to break the uncomfortable silence. "I was confused in all the chaos and got lost."

Still nothing.

"I'm the human from the surface...?"

The silence stretched on for what felt like ages when the sound of heavy footsteps carried over past the knight, to me. He turned his head and stepped aside, revealing Ren, flanked by two others.

My heart sank a bit as I considered how only less than an hour before I'd seen behind the veil.

"What is she doing here," the knight on his right asked. I was about to answer him when silver helmet spoke up.

He was speaking in another language but had much to say. I felt out of place as they spoke to each other in mixed tongues. Ren remained quiet, his gaze never leaving my face.

There was more happening than just him explaining my presence there. While they continued their back and forth, my cheeks warmed. I felt the flush carry over my breasts and down my belly.

How can I still want him? The thoughts confused me. I was sore and knew that hidden parts of me would show bruises tomorrow, but I needed more.

"I'll take her back," Ren spoke, abruptly ending their conversations. "Just gather the others at 20, and we'll begin." The three knights all tilted their heads in agreement and broke away in different directions, leaving me alone with him.

"You don't follow directions," He pulled me through the door and turned his head. Once the other knights were gone from the corridor, he pushed me against the door, with his large frame.

The chill from the metal cut through the thin layer of clothes and between his colossal size and the cold, I lost my breath.

Ren snaked his arm around my waist and rested it on the opposite cheek of my ass. His fingers dug into the flesh, eliciting a grunt from me at the slight pain from his grip.

"First you get yourself lost, then you ignore my instruction to quiet your mind." I was trapped. I put my hands on his chest; the harder he pressed against me, the harder I pushed.

"Do I really not frighten you, tiny human?" His adopted nickname for me made the insides of my lower belly quiver. I was instantly aware of the hollow ache between my legs.

"No, you don't," my voice quivered; not from fear but from something else...

Still pressing against me, he lifted his hand to the helmet, clicked the locks and pulled it off. His hair fell in gentle waves around his face and the soft allure of his swollen lips called to the ache deep within me.

"Is that so?" The hushed tone of his voice fell over me, and I struggled to breath. Ren's synthesized voice stirred a dark desire within me; his unmasked voice, however, only added fuel to the flame.

"Because I am frightened, tiny human." Ren didn't smile, but he sounded playful. He lowered his lips and hovered over my ear. "I'm afraid I won't be able to satiate the thirst you've awakened in me." He paused and I closed my eyes, letting the honey of his voice cover me. "I'm afraid that perfect cunt is all I can think about, now."

I inhaled sharply at the violence of his words juxtaposed with the smooth undercurrent of his tone, and he pulled his face back. He was still leaning down, searching my thoughts no doubt, as I struggled to control them.

I wanted him to take it all; to take whatever he wanted from me. I'd never felt this way before. Irrationally unconcerned with my own self-preservation. I knew whatever was brewing between he and I, it wasn't safe. But, as I was already well past a human's life expectancy, what else could I do that mattered? 

"Well, sir," I licked my lips, unsure of my ability to seduce, "if you want it, take it." I honed my gaze on his lips, aware of the fact I was goading him.

I meant what I said.

He cocked his head; a puzzled look sprinting across his face. I lazily trailed my eyes from his lips, over his perfectly misaligned nose, to his powerful eyes. I slid my fingers down his chest and gripped his waist; a guttural groan escaped from his lips, followed by a dark laugh. 

He stood to his full height and replaced the helmet on his head. His voice came out through the synthesizer again, sending another wave of chills down my spine.

"You may come to regret saying that, tiny human."


	8. Compliance

Ren led me the rest of the way in silence. Had the hallways been full of other metas, I would've understood his lack of acknowledgment, but there was not a soul in sight.

I'd fallen a few paces behind him; his long legs covered so much ground in so little time. It was ok though that I wasn't walking close to him. It eliminated the possibility of whatever strange connection we shared to be revived.

I was still struggling to understand it.

There was no specific detail to focus on because the whole experience had left me (in what felt like) a state of suspension. I wasn't entirely alive, but I was definitely not dead. The only thing that grounded me to reality was the fact that parts of my body ached, that I didn't realize could ache.

With my very limited knowledge of intercourse and even lesser knowledge of sex – the precipice I was looking over felt both foreign and exciting. Every nerve ending in my body was awakened in a manor I'd never felt before. The only thing I could compare it to would've been the adrenaline rush I experienced during a Night hunt. 

The surface was so dangerous, especially minus the dying light of the tired sun. Crouched perfectly still at the edge of what used to be Central Park – hidden beneath bushes and brambles, I would wait. The wildlife was already either too afraid to meander around or too powerful to need to wander. I would remain silent and sensitive to even the slightest movement or sound, while remaining vigilant regarding my own safety. 

How ironic, I considered – stifling a laugh. We arrived at our destination and Ren made quick work with the keypad. He pushed me inside the barrack, and I looked around the same sparsely furnished room. Disappointment.

You should have ignored the pull. Why didn't you just keep going? You'd have been home by now. Away from here...

"You're sure about that," his mechanical voice responded to my private thought. I turned to face him and was not surprised by how big he seemed in the small room. I chose to ignore his unsolicited comment. 

"So, what happens now?" I stood with my shoulders square, unwilling to indicate the depth of my trepidation. I fought violently against the annoyed tenor my thoughts were taking and goosebumps formed along my arms and spine as he remained silent, watching me.

The power of his presence only fueled the irksome quality of the invisible cloud hanging over me. So far, I'd been ripped from my home, forced underground, virginity taken (quite violently I had to admit) and all the while I'd remained a compliant prisoner – not once putting up a fight.

A resonating and short hmm came from his mouthpiece. Something fluttered, deep in my belly, and I swallowed the saliva that involuntarily filled my mouth. "Interesting," he concluded.

It was difficult to differentiate between what was more attractive to me, his regular voice that was smooth and deep, full of delicious undercurrents, or the mechanically monotonous tone that registered formality and duty above all else. It appeared I was easily hypnotized by either.

I closed my eyes as the memory of his natural voice melted me, "open your mouth, little girl," Ren had whispered right before he sucked my bottom into his mouth. As the thought overwhelmed me, I felt the rush of excitement between my legs. Almost as if I were leaking... I opened my eyes and felt my face redden. 

The slight tilt of his helmet alluded to the fact he had indeed heard that, but as I considered how truly meaningless his minor responses were, I calmly turned and walked into the restroom just a few feet away.

Before I could step through the door, however, my body froze. I tried again to move but was held still. There was no comfort in the thin space surrounding me. Ren stepped around me with his hand reaching toward me, as if he were trying to touch me.

A hiss broke the silence as he exhaled and tried desperately to look away. The longer I stared into the darkness that would be his eyes, the more my labia swelled – secreting the slick lubricant. 

I couldn't break eye contact. I was lost in thought, lost in the darkness his mask reflected to me. With my legs spread apart, I was unable to close them – to stop the continued flow. It tickled as it continued to surge.

The stiff air of solitude around me shifted. Even with my vision tunneling into his mask I could sense he had moved closer to me. The smell of smoldering flames and wood filled my senses and my lips parted. I should have felt uncomfortable as the leather of his gloved hand slid over my bottom lip, but I didn't.

The flood worsened.

I exhaled and a tremor worked its way up my back. I remained powerless to jerk beneath it.

His hand continued to slide down. At my neck, his grip tightened for a moment, then slid to my collar bone, then over and beneath my right breast. My eyes closed as his thumb skated over the very sensitive, erect nipple protruding from the thin cotton of my clothes.

A sharp intake of air broke the warm silence enveloping me, followed by a satisfied groan. I opened my eyes as I realized the sound had come from me, and his hand continued grazing over my stomach and pelvis till at last he reached the top of my trousers.

There was no warmth or humanity staring down at me – just the cold, indifferent and unresponsive form of duty - yet still, my vagina... my pussy all but cried out in relief as the rough leather of his glove skimmed over its sensitive core.

"Very... interesting..." the robotic tone of his voice said slowly as he encircled my clitoris. I strained against the invisible force keeping my arms and legs spread – hovering a few inches from the ground.

I shivered considering how powerful he was, as he continued circling and playing with the ridiculously wet center of my current existence. Ren's hands were dripped with the metaphorical blood of my race, my people, and the desire still would not cease. The hunger would not subside.

My body ached to grind against his hand – more friction, harder... please. But the bonds would not allow it. I was forced to remain compliant as he went from one to two fingers - circling my aching core. A tremor of panic filled me as I mentally followed his roaming fingers. Soon the circling of my pussy would turn into those large fingers – masked in the rough leather – pushing inside me.

But as quickly as the thought occurred to me, I felt another rush of fluid seep from me.

"Open your mouth, little human." There was no falter or sway in his voice. I wasn't sure I'd be able to since I was frozen by his power, unable to do anything but move my eyes. "Now," he said more forcefully.

I parted my lips and stared into the deep black of his visor – searching for his eyes and finding nothing. If he was struggling with desire, there was no hint of it in his voice or his rigid stance. My fingers itched to reach out and touch him. Even over his jet-black uniform, I wanted to feel the hard plains of his body again.

I left my mouth ajar as he continued to slowly massage the entrance of my pussy and occasionally run the length of his finger back over my desperate clitoris.

"When I return, you will be ready for me." It was not a question. "Do you understand?" The soft, clipped tone of his voice through the helmet hit me just as strongly as his fingers were hitting my core.

I nodded, leaving my mouth open and his fingers were abruptly free from my trousers and slowly entering my mouth.

The salty taste of his leather gloves mixed with the tang of myself caused my cheeks to heat. I saw my reflection in his visor and my eyes were saucers in size as he twirled his fingers over my tongue and around my mouth – washing my wetness from his hand.

"Soon, little human. Very soon," was the last thing he whispered as he pulled his fingers from my mouth and turned to leave.

The dramatic sweep of his long black cloak flying through the blast door was my last sight of him as a resounding click indicated I'd been locked inside. I slowly sank to the floor – free of his invisible grip, panting for breath; overcome by my own strange desires for him to finish what he'd started and to also sleep.

What is happening?

I lifted my hands to my face and took a deep breath.

I was so tired. I lifted my hands to peek at the time display projection. 

16.2149.4  
N-H22

I rolled my eyes in annoyed disbelief. Night had barely begun when they brought me down here. And now we were in the 22nd hour.

How long had I slept in that cell? When was he planning on coming back? How long was I supposed to stay her...?

As the adrenaline slowly began to fade from my body, I felt the overpowering fatigue claim the last part of my consciousness. I looked lazily over to the bed and contemplated how I would get over to it. As I considered the tiny exodus, I sank to the floor.

The cold stone soothed my overheated body and sleep finally consumed me.


End file.
